― Charles Horton Cooley

 

How we see ourselves comes not from who we really are, but rather from what we believe others see in us. Right or wrong, we shape our self-concepts based on our understanding of the way in which our fellow human beings perceive us.

 

If someone acts grouchy to me, or is quiet around me, or gives me the cold shoulder for no apparent reason, I feel like I must have done something to upset him or her. If people gossip and spread rumors about me, I must have somehow caused those harmful words to be spoken. If I believe that a person thinks I’m mean, then I tend to think I’m mean. If I believe that a person finds me to be very annoying, it’s difficult for me not to feel that way about myself.

 

I suspect that the field of psychology is correct on this point, in that the way we feel about ourselves is formed in our growing up years by the way our parents—or other close family members—felt about us and treated us during that time.

 

Caring what someone else thinks doesn’t have to be so harmful, though, if that Someone is God. Then we can say, “I am not what I think I am, I am what God says I am.” The truth of our identities lies in how God views us.

 

God created us in His image (Genesis 1:27), designing our inmost being and making us in a wonderful manner (Psalm 139:13-14). We are His handiwork (Ephesians 2:10). He loves us so much that He gave His one and only Son to die for us and take on the punishment that we deserved, just so we could have the opportunity to spend eternity in heaven with Him (John 3:16).

 

I might think I’m the most miserable sinner who can never be made right with God. But that’s not who I am. You might think I’ve done far too much harm in this world for God to want anything to do with me. But that’s also not who I am. No matter what I think, or what you think, or even what I think you think, God sees me as His precious child and wants nothing more than to spend eternity with me. Oh, and by the way, He feels the same way about you, too.

 

Troy Burns